This might seem like off-topic, but many of you know that I gained a lot of weight eating fast food because the kitchen was such a wreck and meals couldn't be cooked in there much of the time...
(For an explanation of "Flying... see http://www.flylady.net) Right now, I'm struggling way more with housework than I am with weight.
Sheri's homework today made me think of all the myths I believe in the house area. The myths that make it hard for me to get the house picked up are the EXACT same myths that made it hard to lose weight.
Some of my myths…
The “Go on a diet, lose weight and then you are done” myth. I believe this about the house. “Once I get the house picked up, I’ll be done and then I can relax.”
The “I don’t have time” myth.
The “I have to do it perfectly” myth.
The “Woe is me! I’m so stressed/busy/tired/____ I deserve a break!” myth.
The “I’ll do it tomorrow” myth. Works with both diets and cleaning… and then you have that much more lbs to lose or the house is that much more messy.
The “I have to change for ____________ event”. The weight loss example is I have to lose 20 lbs before my HS reunion or my sister’s wedding or my vacation. The cleaning example is I have to get this place picked up before my mom comes to visit or Christmas or for the house sitter. (Our personal favorite… wouldn’t want the house sitter to have to live like we do.) But a lot of people who lose weight for an event often gain it after the event. Same with the house… it goes to pot after the event.
The quick fix myth. A close relation of the quick fix is the “I just need to read the right book” myth.
The “some people are lucky and born organized and some of us are born slobs and it is almost impossible to change” myth. I actually don’t believe this myth when it comes to weight loss… but I do about cleaning.
The “unorganized people are more creative… it is one of my appealing little quirks”. This is sort of like the myth of the happy fat person who is the life of the party… I’m really tired of being unorganized and I’m sure that it has never been one of my more appealing qualities.
* * * * * That’s all I can think of now… any other fly babies have myths to add? I know that there must be more…
Denise
Posts: 9221 | Location: Silicon Valley, CA | Registered: March 17, 2004
One of the threads is called "Triple dog down" or something like that...
Post three "to dos", go do them, and come back and post your "Tada'"…
Ooooh! I like that one...I might have to throw that one out to my local group. That's cool.
I have to confess that I just spent way too long reading that board...they seem like fun ladies. Glad you found a new place to visit that's working for you!
Ok, outta here to shop....see ya guys in 90 min or so!
My local FLYlady email list is cooking again with everyone posting To-Do/Ta-Da lists. It's fun to focus on this area again and see some stuff get taken care of.
I'll be getting to FLYchat sorta late tonight probably but I will be around for a while if anyone else wants to join me. I have quite a list set up for myself each night this week so I can get some Christmas prep off my list. I should be logging on around 6pm mountain time or so. Have to stop at the grocery store on the way home.
The avoidance Mode... when I'm backsliding, I stop posting and reading. I stop reading FlyLady's emails and I stop posting and reading these threads when I'm gaining weight.
And the letting little disasters turn into big ones mode... letting little weight gains turn into big ones... or letting hot spots turn into big huge raging fires that consume the entire house...
Denise
Posts: 9221 | Location: Silicon Valley, CA | Registered: March 17, 2004
Regarding the shoes, I can't remember if it's Lands End or LL Bean, but one of them makes a great felt clog that is soled. It feels like a slipper but wears like a shoe. Might be a happy medium. They are easy to slip on and off, if small children and or animals are present. They are nice and toasty warm too.
Originally posted by JenniferC: Did you really put shoes on everyday?
I work outside the home 4 days a week so, of course, it's pretty necessary to start the day with shoes on those days. (grin) On the 3 days a week when I'm not working, I do really find that the days I put my shoes on right from the get-go are days I tend to be more productive. If I stay in my slippers, it seems to give my brain a signal that it's okay to vegetate.
Posts: 7864 | Location: Rehoboth Beach, DE | Registered: March 12, 2004
I like flylady's basic philosophy but I found her routines a little too intimidating. I just do the best I can at home and luckily Jesse's been doing his share too lately. If I wore shoes I'd be afraid that I'd step on the cats.
----------- Jen
Posts: 2872 | Location: Ohio | Registered: March 11, 2004
Thank you so much for your imput. I am looking for a nice pair of slippers to use as my "shoes". I did my sink last night and it does look great. I figured that I will have to adjust the routines to fit my schdule with 2 young children it will be hard to get dressed, hair, face & shoes before my Mommy duties start.
Sounds like a reasonable plan. You'll figure it all out and I'm glad to see you are still plugging away at your snacking challenge.
Yeah Denise! I took my own advice and got back to posting mine on the local FLY group that I belong to. I was probably posting my Sunday one at the same moment you were posting yours.
It's been proven to me time and again that I need to keep reading...that this isn't ingrained in me yet to come naturally...and maybe it never will...but do I keep reading? No. I avoid.
Me too. I procrastinated about getting a AIM screen name and fly chatting... I thought, "Oh yeah... that is JUST what I need... another computer activity!! That makes sense... yeah, I'll spend MORE time on my butt on the computer!"
But actually, I learned so much fly chatting and has made a GREAT difference!
The "I've lost my motivation" myth. It is a myth that you NEED motivation to either stay on a cleaning or healthier living plan.
* * * * * *
The Peter Pan approach to life... the myth that every activity can and should be fun... all the time.
You often see this in magazine articles. "Pick an exercise that you LOVE!!!" "Exercise like a kid again - make it FUN!!" Well, truth be known, sometimes exercise is boring and kind of a drudge... but I still need to do it (most of the time)... same with the dishes...
Denise
Posts: 9221 | Location: Silicon Valley, CA | Registered: March 17, 2004
Thank you so much for your imput. I am looking for a nice pair of slippers to use as my "shoes". I did my sink last night and it does look great. I figured that I will have to adjust the routines to fit my schdule with 2 young children it will be hard to get dressed, hair, face & shoes before my Mommy duties start. I am determined to make this work! The plus side is it is occupying my time and I am snacking less and moving more.
Enjoy every minute!
Jennifer
Goals for April: Exercise 3 times a week. Drink more water everyday.
Long Term Goal: Weigh-in at 180 lbs by my next Birthday. (Sept-13/06)
Originally posted by JenniferC: My friend and I have just signed up at The Fly Lady and I was wondering if anybody else has gone through the 31 beginner babysteps?
I didn't think that she had that many.
I can keep track of about 3 baby steps at anyone time.
Actually, if ALL I do everyday is empty the dishwasher in the AM... the whole house stays WAY neater. I'm not sure exactly how it works... but it does.
Denise
Posts: 9221 | Location: Silicon Valley, CA | Registered: March 17, 2004
My friend and I have just signed up at The Fly Lady and I was wondering if anybody else has gone through the 31 beginner babysteps? Did they work for you? Did you really put shoes on everyday?
LOL, well, I don't put shoes on at home and I know FLYLady would just sigh and shake her head. I am torn on what to tell you. I think this is really a 'do as I say, not as I do' thing because even though I don't do things the way she said to, I really should. I probably would have more success and sooner if I would just do what she says. That being said, some of it just doesn't seem to work for me. She has a couple hundred thousand poeple she is trying to write for so not everything is going to work for everybody. I guess the thing I would recommend is to try it her way first (and trust me if you're a true SHE that will be a lot easier said than done) and honestly evaluate what is and isn't working for you. Did you read the thread last week when Denise said she resisted journaling when it was really a key to her success? I think this is a very similar sort of situation so don't blow off FlyLady wisdom lightly. The 31 babysteps thing must be new since I stopped reading regularly but it sounds like a great thing.
Good luck and I hope you'll share a bit about your journey on our board! Oh, and the kitchen sink thing is magic...I don't know why but when my kitchen sink is full of dishes, my house is a mess.
My friend and I have just signed up at The Fly Lady and I was wondering if anybody else has gone through the 31 beginner babysteps? Did they work for you? Did you really put shoes on everyday?
I figure the worst that can happen is that my house will stay the same.
Looking forward to hearing some of your comments.
Enjoy every minute!
Jennifer
Goals for April: Exercise 3 times a week. Drink more water everyday.
Long Term Goal: Weigh-in at 180 lbs by my next Birthday. (Sept-13/06)
I am just thinking... My thinking around weights is VERY perfectionistic... all or nothing and sounds like what you are posting about housecleaning. The end result is that I do not do it- I end up overwhelmed and want to forget about it. This hurts me. Perhaps I could fly with you all and do weights?
Sandy, I'm right there with you on this issue. FLYing works for just about anything. I don't always do cleaning during a FLY...it works for anything that you might procrastinate on...even fun hobby stuff like crafts and long term projects like big declutter projects and even exercising. I know at one point that was something Fer did during a segment or 2 of the Monday Flys.
Another note for you and anyone else who might be wondering...the group usually does a 20 min FLY w/10 min of chatting each 1/2 hour but I've also done and enjoy 45 min FLY w/15 min chats per hour. If you think this might work better on a particular day, shout out and the group may decide to go that route. Sometimes (although this can be just as defeating), I think 20 min isn't 'enough' and I can see where maybe folks had a 30 min weight routine or something that wouldn't work well with the 20 min FLYs. You can also go off and come back 50 min later instead. They aren't super formal or obligating in any way.
I know that a lot of people have used their organizational skills to lose weight. I figure that I can do it backwards and take what I learned losing weight to get organized.
The skills you have learned around baby steps/banishing all-or-none thinking for healthy living are going to DIRECTLY apply back to this stuff. I just did it the reverse order but I don't think it really matters which place you lay the foundation. The foundation is solid and the things you build on it will be easier and faster to learn.
Hugs! You have given so very much to so many by sharing your thoughts and wisdom re: healthy living. I really hope you will reach out regularly with this part of your journey because you should get the support you need AND I know you aren't alone in this journey either!
It's been proven to me time and again that I need to keep reading...that this isn't ingrained in me yet to come naturally...and maybe it never will...but do I keep reading? No. I avoid.
I'll try to remember to bump this thread back up after the weekend when you guys get home...
Is this maybe another moment of all-or-none? I know that I got sort of overwhelmed by the digests I was getting. I was struggling with all the indiv. emails but the digests just sat in my in-box. I'm thinking you've said you were on digest too. Maybe go ahead and turn the indiv. messages back on and then ruthlessly delete anything you don't read that day or delete all but x number of messages a day (I would say 1-3). Even if you only read one per day, it would probably get the effect you are looking for of inspiring/keeping you in focus.
