Did you see Oprah today? (Yesterday if you are really answering this on Thursday). She gave a five question test to determine how happy you are.

From the show How Happy Are You?

How satisfied are you? To find out, read the following five statements. Then, use the 1–7 scale to rate your level of agreement and add your answers together.

1 = Not at all true
4 = Moderately True
7 = Absolutely True

In most ways, my life is close to ideal.
1 2 3 4 5 6 7

The conditions of my life are excellent.
1 2 3 4 5 6 7

I am satisfied with my life.
1 2 3 4 5 6 7

So far I have gotten the important things I want in life.
1 2 3 4 5 6 7

If I could live my life over, I would change almost nothing.
1 2 3 4 5 6 7


I got a 25. I'm happy!

Linda

quote:

Originally posted by Sandy:

quote:

Originally posted by SheriaVa:

And the fact that I feel so blessed is rather ironic, I guess, when you consider that there are people who consider me pitiable...

I get some of this too, Sheri. My friends and family are chuck full of over-achievers-- lawyers, docs and more. People wonder why I am "just a teacher" and why I "only stay home"-- I happen to love what I do and I know it is right for me, but others often see me as the one who "didn't quite make it."
As I get older I don't mind this--- Didn't Popeye say, "I am what I am." ????

I'm in a family of high powered, very career driven MBAs and get some of this too. Why I "wasted" my ivy league education in by "just" low paying doing hospice work, then quiting to be a sahm and then the career change to be a wellness coach.

I've also had some incredible saddness in my life but in the end, all my choices, all the events that happened along the way helped shaped who I am today. I like who I am and wouldn't want to change a thing.

I really believe that its the hardship times in life that are when your soul really grows. It's rare that people do lots of self exploration, challenging beliefs, etc when everything is peachy keen.

quote:

Originally posted by SheriaVa:

And the fact that I feel so blessed is rather ironic, I guess, when you consider that there are people who consider me pitiable...

I get some of this too, Sheri. My friends and family are chuck full of over-achievers-- lawyers, docs and more. People wonder why I am "just a teacher" and why I "only stay home"-- I happen to love what I do and I know it is right for me, but others often see me as the one who "didn't quite make it."
As I get older I don't mind this--- Didn't Popeye say, "I am what I am." ????

quote:

Originally posted by Sandy:
The homework reminded me of something I often say: I never thought I would get such a blessed life after growing up under very trying circumstances.

This is, in a nutshell, what I was saying with my response to the homework. I feel so extraordinarily blessed to have the life I do that I can't find much to complain about (that's not to say I don't have my days of complaining).

And the fact that I feel so blessed is rather ironic, I guess, when you consider that there are people who consider me pitiable...I'm 54 and never married, no children, live in a tiny 1-bedroom rental, schlep my laundry down the street, etc....but I see myself as a VERY blessed person.

It's all in the perspective. For women to whom having a man and/or having children is their everything...their purpose...I WOULD seem sad and pitiful. That doesn't make me sad and pitiful.

Hugs to everyone.

The homework reminded me of something I often say: I never thought I would get such a blessed life after growing up under very trying circumstances. ---- And I know that circumstances change- sometimes in an instant. (My next door neighbor's 57 YO husband dropped dead from a heart attack last summer.) I try to be very, very grateful each day.

I figure that with my family in tact and my family's health in tact, I have most everything.

In going back over this, I agree with you about the day and how I feel. I think happiness is subjective and does depend on the circumstances of your life at that time. Overall, I live my life, but in rating it, and only being given numbers to go by, not explanations, I am a very depressed sad individual. And I find that sad.

Remember, like any thing we eat, there are times when rating your life, is just plain not a true picture of how thing are, because there are times we would choose to eat candy, sweets, fried foods, and there are circumstances that need to be explained.

Good thought ideas on the homework, it gave me things to think about, but not necessarily live by.

I haven't gone through and done all the questions for a number value. Partly because how I feel about my life right now really depends on the day.

Yesterday was a good day, today is good. But I still feel lousy having been sick for the last week. I took Wednesday night to just blow off, sending hubby out for a couple of hours just to have some me time. Feeling lousy certainly affects how happy I am right now.

I have lots of good things in my life right now. I have some frustrating things in my life. But I have been reminded that I have to make a choice, and it's a conscious one no matter which way to choose. I can either be where I am and look ahead with joy and hope, or I can get lost in the current details and let my normally pessimistic side run my attitude.

But I certainly would not go back even 1 year ago. I am much more content now.

quote:

Originally posted by D in St Pete:
I didn't explain that well, BMom...one of the things I *want* is to never have to feel that again because none of them ever have to die again. (Please don't take this as a position either way on supporting or not supporting the war in Iraq...just that I'd prefer EVERYONE in the world, especially those who make a decision to protect others, to feel honored and respected and at peace in their last moments on earth.)

I have to deal with data about the deaths at work. And I get teary, always. The people around me have stopped thinking I'm weird and started to think that my emotions are close to the surface instead. (See? I love my job. But that part is not happy, and will never make me feel happy.)

Ah! Sorry I misunderstood you.

In most ways, my life is close to ideal. 2
My life is far from ideal, I have health problems, I live in a house in a town I hate, I have extended family problems, and I know that I am not happy.

The conditions of my life are excellent. 2
Basically they suck and I make the best of bad lemons

I am satisfied with my life. 4
No, I am NOT satisfied, I would change much, I would keep much. But satisfied, I think if you are totally satisfied, you quit moving to be better, no obsessively, but you quit.

So far I have gotten the important things I want in life. 6
This is one I can score high on, when I was 19 all I wanted was to be a wife, a mother and a teacher, I have done all three and done them to my approval.

If I could live my life over, I would change almost nothing. 2
I would change just about everything. I would not have come from the family I did, I wouldn't have been the places I've been, and I would never have moved to the place I am now. I would keep my husband and children and dogs. I would have taken better care of me.


So I got a 16. and that makes me what?

I keep moving and keep trying to be better. But there are some facets of life, you admit you can't change and you live with, some are pleasant some are hell. But you live with them.

I didn't explain that well, BMom...one of the things I *want* is to never have to feel that again because none of them ever have to die again. (Please don't take this as a position either way on supporting or not supporting the war in Iraq...just that I'd prefer EVERYONE in the world, especially those who make a decision to protect others, to feel honored and respected and at peace in their last moments on earth.)

I have to deal with data about the deaths at work. And I get teary, always. The people around me have stopped thinking I'm weird and started to think that my emotions are close to the surface instead. (See? I love my job. But that part is not happy, and will never make me feel happy.)

quote:

Originally posted by D in St Pete:
[...]and to stop feeling emotional pain and heartache at a soldier's death.[...]

I hope we never stop doing that.

1. Ideal how? The "ideal" I had a girl, which I've realized was everyone else's version of my "perfect" life? Or the "ideal" that I have about what happiness is and how I fit into the world? So...erm...I don't know how to answer it. And it's not the "ideal" I had even 6 months ago, but that doesn't mean it's crappy.

2. The physical conditions of my life...based on what's around me, what's in the world, or what I want? I'm a 7, without a doubt, when compared to those who don't have shelter or regular meals; I'm a 2 or 3 when I see the work I want to do around the house and the changes I'd like to make in my physical condition.

3. I am "satisfied" with my life. That's weird, though...I'm trying to imagine being "unsatisfied." Maybe it's because I've been severely depressed, but "unsatisfied" is a state of simply not wanting to live, in which case I definitely wouldn't be posting on this board.

4. The "important things I want in life"? Those change from decade to decade and even year to year. I thought, 20 years ago, that I wanted to be a socialite, married to a wealthy man from a good family, staying at home and taking care of one or two children. I realized that's NOT what I wanted when I was 23 or 24. But I'm not sure I'll ever attain some of the important things I want, like a "cure" for depression and to stop feeling emotional pain and heartache at a soldier's death.

5. If I could live my life over, I'd change many, many small things. That's an "unfair" question for a perfectionist, though. I look at my life like a book, and want to edit. Everything can use some cleaning up and fixing, my life included.

I think if I managed to ever pick numbers, it would show that I'm ridiculously unhappy. I'm not, though. I'm content. I'm pleased with my life. "Happy" isn't an emotion that I consistently feel. That might be sad, but it's just how I work. Content, safe, secure, pleased..."happy" is reserved for occasions. Maybe I just define it differently, but it's impossible (in my mind) for anyone to be in a constant state of "happy" as I define it.

I wonder how someone like Mother Theresa would have answered these questions. Did she think her life was "close to ideal"? Do you think she was ever REALLY satisfied with her life, or did she think there was always MORE she could be doing to help? Did she get the important things she wanted, or was each child who died because they didn't have clean water another reason to continue her work?

I see the good in the world. I strive to maintain an even keel, without veering to far either way, and approach things with an even, calm mind. That's not "happy" to me, that's functional

[quote]1 = Not at all true
4 = Moderately True
7 = Absolutely True
1 = Not at all true
4 = Moderately True
7 = Absolutely True



In most ways, my life is close to ideal.
1 2 3 4 5 6 7

5



The conditions of my life are excellent.
1 2 3 4 5 6 7

7

I am satisfied with my life.
1 2 3 4 5 6 7

6

So far I have gotten the important things I want in life.
1 2 3 4 5 6 7

6

If I could live my life over, I would change almost nothing.
1 2 3 4 5 6 7

6



I scored a 30. According to this I'm happy.

I'm not sure I'm in agreement that these questions can really determine if you are happy or not. For example, "The conditions of my life are excellent." Well, I have lived and visited 3rd world countries. The conditions in which I live are OUTSTANDING in comparision. I appreciate what I have, it doesn't mean that it makes me happy. (It doesn't make me unhappy.)

I rated this question higher than Sheri, but I feel kind of the same way about "I'm satisfied with my life". I am satified with most things about my life. I grew up with loving relatively stable parents. We were fairly average middle class. I have a really good education. I have wonderful husband, a great son, we have a nice life overall, but I don't always feel satisfied with myself. With my life in general yes, but I always have a feeling of "You can do better, you can do better, you can do better." That perfectionist thing rearing its ugly head again...

Dawn

I watched that show, wasn't it great? There were some aha moments for me: when the banker-turned-trapese artist said that there are different types of valuable compensation, my brain went ding-ding-ding! We have all heard a million times that money doesn't buy happiness -but I had never heard it put quite that way. As I am job-searching right now, it helps me to look at what kind of compensation I want. I would take less money to do work that matters or work for an inspiring leader, however, I would also feel disrespected to be unfairly compensated financially. Its and interesting paradox.

Anyway, I scored 30 and I was HAPPY with that!



Sheri - I too wish that the low scoring guests on the show had been given more options. I wanted to know why the lowest scorer was so miserable! I did like what the author said about looking at the past and accepting that there is no changing it. By the way, I miss Starting Over!

Lynne

I saw the show and enjoyed it, though my criticism of it is the same as so many shows like this. They do a great job of defining what's wrong and showing plenty of examples of it, but they give short (or shorter) shrift (IMHO) to how to fix the problem--i.e., okay, I'm unsatisfied--now what do I do about it?



In most ways, my life is close to ideal.

Other than not owning my own home and wishing I had a somewhat larger circle of friends, my life is pretty darned great. I'd say a 5.5.

The conditions of my life are excellent.

Again, other than having to do dishes by hand and schlep laundry down the street to wash it, my conditions are pretty good. I'd say a 4.5.

I am satisfied with my life.

This is difficult because defining "satisfied" as well as the scope of "life" is difficult for me. There are things I'm not happy about myself--like the fact that I sit and play Sims or watch TV instead of feeding my brain and my creativity and that I struggle with staying connected to my family in a regular and meaningful way. So if being unsatisfied with myself equals being unsatisfied with my life, then I guess this would be more like a 3.

So far I have gotten the important things I want in life.

Other than my own home and success at finding and keeping a long-term romantic relationship in my life, I'd say I've gotten not only most of what I've wanted but I've gotten things I didn't even know as a young girl from a poor family in small-town Ohio that I COULD want or have. I'd say 5 for this one.

If I could live my life over, I would change almost nothing.

There are a lot of tiny blips on the radar in my past that I would change--brief moments (almost always involving a man) that I now cringe in embarassment about--but they are not important, life-changing things. I think that my life made me who I am and I'm pretty darn happy about who I am, so no, there isn't much I would change because then I wouldn't be me. I'd give this one a 6.

I think that gives me a 24 out of a possible 35. I'm happy with that.

1 = Not at all true
4 = Moderately True
7 = Absolutely True

In most ways, my life is close to ideal.
1 2 3 4 5 6 7

Not even close to ideal, so a 1

The conditions of my life are excellent.
1 2 3 4 5 6 7

Again, not even close to excellent, so another 1

I am satisfied with my life.
1 2 3 4 5 6 7

Definately not satisfied, 1

So far I have gotten the important things I want in life.
1 2 3 4 5 6 7

a 2 here or maybe a 3

If I could live my life over, I would change almost nothing.
1 2 3 4 5 6 7

If I could live my life over, I would change almost everything except dd so I guess this would be a 1 also. I often wonder what my life would have been like if I had stayed in college in 1968 instead of dropping out and getting a job.

That gives me a 6 or 7 but I have a roof over my head, food in my stomach (too much sometimes ) and friends and family that I care about and that care about me, so just because my life is not ideal and I am not satisfied with it does not mean I am not a happy person. I think I am a fairly happy person (most of the time).

PS:
I walked into a classroom one time and across the top of the board the teacher had written:

"A truly happy person is one who can enjoy the scenery when forced to take a detour."

This message has been edited. Last edited by: BrenauMom,

31 for me.

I did this yesterday on Oprah's website and came out at 30 so I guess I qualify as "happy" : )

In most ways, my life is close to ideal.
1 2 3 4 5 6 7


By the world's standards, we won't even go there....by my standards, this would be a 5.5

The conditions of my life are excellent.
1 2 3 4 5 6 7

Again, by the world's standards....eh......in my opinion, and in my heart.....6

I am satisfied with my life.
1 2 3 4 5 6 7


A big FAT 7!!!!


So far I have gotten the important things I want in life.
1 2 3 4 5 6 7

Another 6


If I could live my life over, I would change almost nothing.
1 2 3 4 5 6 7

Actually, there are many things in my past, that if I could live my life over, I would change, most definitely. SO, this one is a 2.5


Looks like I've got a 27....I think that is pretty good, and whether or not this quiz says I"m happy. I can in all honesty, say that I am very content in my present life, and in my present circumstances. There is VERY little that I would change about my present life. And the things that I would change are completely within my own control, I just need to get with it, and make those changes! But they aren't necessarily "quality of life" issues, just some heart issues.

I got a 23...what does that make me? Sorta happy?