I am a 46 yr. old food addict and I really don't know where to turn to get some help.

I weigh approximately 325 lbs, have high blood pressure, sleep apnea, semi-bad cholesterol levels, etc...

I know I'm an emotional eater, and I typically binge at night. I have been in denial for a long time and recently have tried to take steps to get back into a more healthier lifestyle.

I joined a gym and have a personal trainer, who promptly put me on a food plan, which I have found too restrictive. I am obviously rebelling against it and I told the trainer that I have serious food issues, but I just don't think he understands where I am coming from.

Where does a person begin????

Congratulations on taking baby steps! That is totally the way to go. It might take a long time to get where you want to be but it will happen! This is such a great place to come for support and ideas. I have to say, without being here I don't know that I'd have made the progress that I have. Keep reading posts, even if you don't want to respond. There are great people here and we've all had our struggles. That is why we are here. But there are also a lot who have had great success and have a lot of great things to share!
Jill

I think you probably are better off without the trainer -- it sounds like he wasn't really paying attention to what you wanted/needed from him.

I think you might want to look through the book recommendations on this thread -- a lot of them deal with the binge eating issues, and you can probably find some at your local library.

I think that Cathy has a good suggestion about the journaling -- starting to look at what is driving your binging would be a very good first step.

quote:

So in my effort to take some baby steps, I think the first thing I need to do is not only examine what issues are causing me to overeat, and simultaneously do something about this late night binging.

Do you have a journal that you can write down those issues that are causing you to overeat? Do that instead of raiding the frig or cupboards late night. I have one that I write on the front side those things that are bothering me and what I did, and on the back page I write my successes for the day, or how I would have like to manage to the problem without eating. I keep it handy and review when I get in a pinch.

What are you "pigging out" on at night. Can you throw those things out, and only have healthy snacks available. I keep a container of celery, carrots, etc in my frig..they require crunching...and then I keep yogurt of many flavors and fruit. I can either make a rich smoothie, or eat them separately, but at the very least, if I pig out on those, they are healthy.

My last hint, when you start to feel like you are going to loose it late at night, come here. Pour yourself a big glass of ice tea, or other lo cal drink, sit down and write us here....many of us do when we are feeling the lack of control...you never know who you will meet at midnight hanging around.

quote:

Originally posted by hubbabubba:
[...]
If I had to pinpoint my one problem area it is eating late at night. I will often binge eat by myself at night. Within a short period of time, I will pack away the food and ruin my good eating habits of the entire day.

[...]HB

To start with change what food you eat in the evening. Get some fruits and prep them ahead of time. Kathleen recommends keeping them at eye level in the fridge so that they are the first thing you see when you open it craving a snack.

I especially like white grapes. You can pop them in your mouth like popcorn only you get full faster

Wow...thank you for all your encouragement. Just as a follow-up. I got rid of the personal trainer. Ironically, not because of the exercising, but because of getting weighed in and the topsy-turvy rollercoaster ride that whole issue causes. He would not forego weighing in because he insisted on knowing my progress.

So I am going to try and exercise on my own.

One thing I did remember was Kathleen talking about making granola and how it helped her to lose weight. So I made up her recipe and I must admit, it was very good. I just finished up the granola and I'm going to make a second batch today. It is very easy to prepare.

If I had to pinpoint my one problem area it is eating late at night. I will often binge eat by myself at night. Within a short period of time, I will pack away the food and ruin my good eating habits of the entire day.

So in my effort to take some baby steps, I think the first thing I need to do is not only examine what issues are causing me to overeat, and simultaneously do something about this late night binging.

Any input is always welcome and appreciated. Thanks in advance...HB

quote:

Hey HubbaBubba, You posted "I'm overwhelmed". Did we totally overwhelm you more and scare you off? I hope not.

Me too. This always happens to newbie posts like this. It is a lovely sign of how wonderfully helpful this board is but I suspect it's a little overwhelming. Makes me want to go find my first post. I was digging the other day and found some early posts...I was cracking up.

Peg

quote:

Originally posted by p7eggyc:
I generally advocate counseling not because I think everyone needs it but because I think it can be helpful to determine IF you need it. I definitely stand by my statement that very few gym trainers are going to know how to approach the issues of 100+ lb weight loss and strongly advocate adding some other professionals to the mix.

Totally agree with you there!

Also, lots of studies show that overweight people tend to be depressed at rates higher than the general population. I think that a lot of us self medicate with food and that working on depression issues and working on healthier ways to cope REALLY help with binging.

Hey HubbaBubba, You posted "I'm overwhelmed". Did we totally overwhelm you more and scare you off? I hope not.

Take all of our advice with a grain of salt and use what is useful and feel free to ingore the rest.

quote:

I don't know if every person who has ever binged is in need of counseling or should be labeled with an eating disorder

I totally agree with you on this but there were several things in hubba's post that made me think that maybe she could use some assistance figuring out if the issues were truly "serious food issues". I generally advocate counseling not because I think everyone needs it but because I think it can be helpful to determine IF you need it. I definitely stand by my statement that very few gym trainers are going to know how to approach the issues of 100+ lb weight loss and strongly advocate adding some other professionals to the mix.

Peg

I'll throw one more book out there...it's an older one but I found it incredibly useful. It's called "overcoming overeating" by Jane R. Hirschmann and Carol H. Munterseful and talks about emotional eating quite a bit. Amazon has new & used copies listed from $4.13.

I would second the recommendation for the food plan in Strong Women Stay Slim. Bob Greene's books also have a lot to say about emotional eating.

I don't know if every person who has ever binged is in need of counseling or should be labeled with an eating disorder.

Because it is sort of hard to quantify a “binge”… some people say the word is over used and what some people call a binge, really isn’t. And somebody on the WW boards once said that half a sheet cake wasn’t a binge as it technically wasn’t enough calories.

Anyway, dieting is a HUGE predictor of binging and Lord knows there are enough bingers on the WW boards since MOST people on those boards have a dieting history. I don't think that there are enough councilors in the US to handle us all.

Most people are figuring out how to eat like "normal" people without counseling. Somebody on the WW boards once pointed out that them who say, "I'm not really an emotional eater... I'm fat because I just love food" often turn out to be the biggest nut jobs.

Every person needs to make that call for themselves, if they need counseling or not.

OTOH, I saw a reg. Dietician (for cholesterol) and found it very helpful… I would think that a RD would have a much better grasp of nutrition and you needs/issues than a personal trainer.

The people who have responded to you thus far have given you some very sound and good leads. Let me just say welcome, come here everyday that you can...we are very supportive and have lots of experience in the road that you are traveling.
Ask questions, share ideas, and above all remember it's not how fast you get there, but that you keep going. Welcome.

Welcome to the group. I see that there is alot of input. However, I just wanted to welcome you and answer your question, "where does a person begin?"

For me, I couldn't start everything at once...the diet, the exercise and all that. I do have a trainer, but due to the club restrictions they aren't allowed to give diet advice/plans.

I have crashed and burned so many times trying it that way. I'm now a firm believer in baby steps. I started out with the exercise component. It took me over a year before I really looked at my food intake seriously. It was too overwhelming and painful.

I do suffer from a binge disorder. Nights and weekends are my danger zone. I have been severely overweight most of my life...with periods where I was thinner and heavier. I knew that the only way the weight is going to stay off is to tackle those emotional issues. It's the emotions, anxiety and all that stuff that throws a monkey wrench into things.

For me, the only option I could see was to go see a nutritionist/counselor. She works with eating disordered patients. I started seeing her about 9 months ago. It's been an up and down battle. I know before the last loss of 10 lbs in July breaking my plateau. I spent 3 or 4 months, maybe even 6 months, bouncing back and forth within the same 10 - 15 lb range. For me it was so discouraging, depressing and frustrating...just wanting to give up....but I kept up with what I could do and continued to try to work on my eating habits. I also take the approach that this is a lifestyle change. It's not a diet. Diets are temporary.

I would strongly suggest to go see a nutritionist/counselor who specializes in eating problems. I have found out that I need to have people around me who are supportive and understand, that includes my medical team. I'm not saying you need to ditch your trainer, but it sounds like you may need to find a different trainer who will work with you and be more understanding. Exercise, eating healthy and all that has to have some joy in it. Otherwise, why stick with it? Finding that joy is one of the hard parts.

I remember when I was younger, I was having alot of stomach upset and feared I was following in the footsteps of my mom's stomach problems. Well, I wrote her and asked for her advice on how to stop the gastric upset. I didn't have an ulcer. Anyway, she told me that I needed to stop eating all these foods that had some spices or anything that could be potentially upsetting. She suggested that I eat baked potatoes, canned peaches or fruit cup, cottage cheese and a couple of other things. It was what had helped her. To me that was like a "death sentence" of bland food. Not that I ate stuff that was really hot and spicy anyway. I kind of tried it, but it didn't work. My gastric upset was mostly coming from of course the bingeing, but also large amounts of stress.

There are a couple of books, I would like to recommend, which may help. They have helped me.

1. Eating in the Light of the Moon: How Women Can Transform Their Relationship With Food Through Myths, Metaphors & Storytelling by Anita Johnson, PhD

2. The Body Betrayed by Kathryn J Zerbe, M.D. (informative and a good reference)

This is a wonderful group. I'm so glad I stumbled across it when Cooking Thin was still on the Food Network. Kathleen has some great recipes and cooking tips, not to mention she reinforces the balanced approach and taking baby steps to get to where you need to be.. Which in the long run, in my opinion is the best approach of all.

Which reminds me... there's this cute, very funny movie with Bill Murray and Richard Dryfess(sp).. about baby stepping to what you want...called "What about Bob?". If you ever get a chance to rent it, see it. When I think of the baby stepping...I always think of that movie. It has nothing to do with diets, but the underlying message I got was so much more.


Serene

Welcome to the board. You've gotten lots of great input. Hope to see you keep posting.

I hate to overwhelm you more with another suggestion, but have you read Passing for Thin by Frances Kuffel? It's the memoir of a recovering food addict and may be helpful to you. It's smart and funny and a good read.

I also am a regular reader of Frances's Amazon.com blog, where she shares her continuing struggles with food issues. There is a regular community of readers who comment and share ideas. It's a good group of people and you might find it helpful.

Welcome!
You already have a boatload of good suggestions so I will just say hello & welcome for right now

I did bump up a thread of helpful tips.

Welcome!

I agree that you have already begun! Working with a trainer and posting here are great big giant steps - good for you!!!!

As far as where to go from here, I agree with Peg about trying to get linked with an RD and/or a counselor who specializes in binge eating (there are lots of very qualified folks out there).

I would also agree to trying to not make too many changes all at once. Pick a couple of things to work on (see the Baby Steps thread that was bumped up) and focus on those instead of the big picture (which is just way too overwhelming).

I would also caution you against making a radical drop in your calories. Even dropping down to 2000/day may be too big of a change.

To lose 1-2 pounds/week (the recommended "safe" amount of weight loss), you just need to cut 500 calories/day out of what you are currently eating.

That could be done by burning 250 calories with your trainer and then eating 250 less calories.

250 calories is easy to get rid of. For example, 1 T of oil or a butter has 120 calories
1 roll of bread could be as much as 200.

You can do this and you've come to the right place for support, encouragement and ideas!

Hi Hubbabubba! Welcome!

I wanted to add that it is unlikely that a gym personal trainer would have the appropriate training to work with your emotional eating issues. You might want to add some services of other professionals to meet your needs. One option would be to see a registered dietician and I think you would be able to locate one that also specializes in eating disorders such as binging and emotional eating. Depending on your health insurance, this may be covered as a medical necessity so you'll want to talk to your primary care physician and any nurseline available from your insurance to determine what might be an option. If your health insurance does not wind up covering it, you might want to check with your local health department (probably a county service if you are in the US). Mine here in CO offers these services on a sliding-scale fee with the full price being less than $50 an hour. I agree with Denise that if you are being handed some sort of generic gym eating plan, it is probably not appropriate for your weight or issues. You might also consider some mental health counseling. Again, health insurance will cover lots of this or there are community based options out there too.

We have tons of ideas and thoughts around here so I'm going to stop there. Share what you've tried, what has and hasn't worked, what you discover. There's a wealth of info here!

Oh, and you already started! One of the major keys to my success was learning to give myself credit for every single positive step I took. I encourage you to start practicing that. It feels sooooo good, soon you'll be looking for more positive steps so you can keep saying nice things to yourself.

Peg

Welcome! Where does a person begin? One step at a time, just like when learning to walk. As others have already said "baby steps" is our mantra here.

I failed at losing weight or eating healthier for more than 3 decades because I tried to do everything at once and tried to be way too stringent with myself--I could never succeed that way. I have been eating healthy for 3 years now and, while it is easiER for me to manage healthy eating and regular exercise now, it is by no means easy. I still struggle with wanting to eat things that do not fit in with my health goals.

You know what made the difference this time? Why I changed my eating and exercise habits for good in 2003 instead of temporarily going on a diet for the thousandth time? Because I made it about my health this time...not about getting thinner for a special event or fitting into a particular dress size or being more attractive to men...it was (and is) about reducing my cholesterol, losing weight and giving myself the gift of health.

You owe yourself that gift as well. Stick around and we'll help you realize it!