This came from another message board I just joined:
(the comment's in ( ) are from the original poster
whom I have met once thru dd)
In Honor of Stupid People . . . .
In case you needed further proof that the human race is
doomed through stupidity, here are some actual label
instructions on consumer goods.
On a Sears hairdryer -- Do not use while sleeping.
(That's the only time I have to work on my hair.)
On a bag of Fritos -- You could be a winner! No purchase
necessary. Details inside.
(the shoplifter special?)
On a bar of Dial soap --
"Directions: Use like regular soap."
(and that would be???....)
On some Swanson frozen dinners -- "Serving suggestion:
Defrost."
(but, it's just a suggestion.)
On Tesco's Tiramisu dessert (printed on bottom) -- "Do
not turn upside down."
(well...duh, a bit late, huh!)
On Marks &Spencer Bread Pudding -- "Product will be hot
after heating."
(...and you thought????...)
On packaging for a Rowenta iron -- "Do not iron clothes
on body."
(but wouldn't this save me time?)
On Boot's Children Cough Medicine -- "Do not drive a car
or operate machinery after taking this medication."
(We could do a lot to reduce the rate of construction
accidents if we could just get those 5 year-olds with
head-colds off those bulldozers.)
On Nytol Sleep Aid -- "Warning: May cause drowsiness."
(...I'm taking this because???....)
On most brands of Christmas lights -- "For indoor or
outdoor use only."
(as opposed to what?)
On a Japanese food processor -- "Not to be used for the
other use."
(now, somebody out there, help me on this. I'm a bit
curious.)
On Sainsbury's peanuts -- "Warning: contains nuts."
(talk about a news flash)
On an American Airlines packet of nuts -- "Instructions:
Open packet, eat nuts."
(Step 3: say what?)
On a child's Superman costume -- "Wearing of this garment
does not enable you to fly."
(I don't blame the company. I blame the parents for this
one.)
On a Swedish Chainsaw -- "Do not attempt to stop chain
with your hands or genitals."
(Oh my God..was there a lot of this happening somewhere?)
"Live your life so that you are not afraid to sell the family parrot to the town gossip."
