Passing for Thin: Losing Half My Weight and Finding My Self by Frances Kuffel
New York: Broadway Books, 2003

Review by Jennifer Sader

Self-help books can be annoyingly positive sometimes in that they lead you to believe that once you make up your mind to change your life, all you have to do is follow the simple, smart strategies outlined in the various books until you've achieve your desired end. Somehow, in spite of purchasing a half dozen books in the last year or so and despite my Courage to Be Rich, My Purpose Driven Life raced past the 9 Steps to Financial Freedom and I'm still broke. But I did lose weight. And therein lies the problem.

The new body came without an instruction manual. Yours will too. Trying to get used to a body that no longer fits into your closet full of clothes is completely weird. The person that shows up in the mirror every morning is perkier, more shapely and downright diva but figuring out how she is me and how we can become one, isn't easy.

I found reassurance in Passing for Thin, one woman's story of losing, as the title suggests, approximately half her body weight after being overweight for most of her life. Ideally, any woman who is considering embarking on significant weight loss will read this as a guidebook on the journey from "The Planet of Fat" to "The Planet of Girls." Kuffel shows us that losing weight isn't really just about saying no to potato chips. The most fascinating aspects of this book are Kuffel's struggles to redefine herself as a thin person, and as a woman who is interested in "girly" things like clothes and manicures and men. Despite the female focus, I think men will find Kuffel's insights helpful too.

Kuffel describes herself as a food addict and gives us a tour of the twelve-step system for overcoming addictions. Skeptics might wonder if it's really possible to become addicted to food in the same way a person can be addicted to drugs or alcohol. Kuffel makes a good case. Her story is one of gradually reawakening to the world outside her obsessive interest in food. At her meetings, she gains a food plan that helps her lose weight and gain the support she needs to rebuild her life.

Kuffel shares the small and unexpected triumphs of her weight loss, like bending over to tie her shoes for the first time without putting her foot up on a step and she shares embarrassing, mean, and petty moments too. When she decides she's ready to sponsor someone at a meeting, she realizes "I don't really like fat people much. I want a pretty sponsee, someone I can be proud of. I shook my head in disgust with myself but there it was... prejudice was no excuse for not helping someone." Kuffel doesn't sugar coat setbacks and is often ambushed by her addiction. She realizes her recovery will never be complete and that she will always have to work on her issues and access support.

Passing for Thin has recently been released in paperback. Cooking Thin readers at any stage of their weight-loss journey can find a kindred spirit here, as well as a reminder of the importance of support and friendship.

Jennifer Sader is a freelance writer, part-time doctoral student and recreational athlete. She has completed several sprint and international distance triathlons and three half-marathons. Her next goal is to do the Columbus Marathon. She is supported in all her endeavors by her wonderful husband of ten years, Jesse Squire, who inspired her to do her first competitive event, a 5K run, at the ripe old age of 20. Email Jennifer Sader: jensader@yahoo.com

Photo: András